A must-read reference for those of you who are caregivers to either a member of your family or a friend, this heartwarming, supportive book explains to you the intricacies of the caregiving experience. The Caregiver's Sourcebook features separate sections on caregiving for specific disorders including AIDS/HIV, Alzheimer's disease, Parkinson's disease, heart disease, old age, and much more.
CHAPTER 1
Becoming a Caregiver
Two-thirds of all Americans are involved in looking
after someone else -- a family member, an older friend, a neighbor down
the street. Some people even give up their jobs or work shorter hours to
look after an ailing family member. We hear a lot about how selfish
people are, how people no longer look after one another. But this is not
true. We are a caregiving society. And whether you are a family member,
a volunteer, or a professional caregiver, my purpose here is to offer
you both practical information and emotional support.
There is nothing as decent as one human being caring for another. This
is the essence of how we should live. Together we are like a tribe,
protecting one another, accepting responsibility for one another. We
reach across the barriers of race and language and religion when we help
to fulfill the needs of others. It can almost be said to be sacred work
-- this reaching out -- because the sick, disabled, or aged person
demands the best of us on a daily basis.
It is a challenge to touch and be touched on such a deep level. Your own
deep issues about love and need will constantly be stirred. As you begin
to care for another person, you also begin to discover things about
yourself. And this is a blessing. But wanting to care for another person
is not enough. Generally speaking, if you do not care for yourself, or
about yourself, you cannot care properly for someone else. There is
probably no worse fate for a sick person than to be looked after by an
angry, overtired caregiver who is preoccupied with her own personal
problems. I hope you will find support in this book for your own journey
as a caregiver, and I urge you to stay alert to your own personal
growth. Caregiving can transform your life -- often in very unexpected
ways. If you have the potential for this work, you may even find that it
offers spiritual rewards.
And our society needs caregivers. Today, more people than ever before
are living into old age. People survive illnesses and accidents in
greater numbers than at any time in history. We are also facing new
plagues that often require home care. AIDS and the newly emerging
autoimmune diseases -- fibromyalgia, lupus, chemical sensitivity, and
Gulf War syndrome -- all are on the rise. We are also in the middle of
an epidemic of cancer. One woman in nine has breast cancer and one man
in four has prostate cancer. At some point, most of these people will
need home care.
There has never been a more urgent need for people to learn the art of
caregiving. And yet there are few resources to teach us this art. We are
trying to learn in a society that has temporarily forgotten these
necessary skills.
There are several reasons why this is so. After the Second World War,
health care became institutionalized. People would go to the hospital if
they were seriously ill. Old or sick people who needed long-term care
would go into the appropriate institutions. Death, and birth, no longer
took place at home.
In the past few years, changes of lifestyle and economics have meant
that most people, even mothers of small children, work outside the home.
The increasing divorce rate, coupled with falling levels of child
support, have left many women, the traditional caregivers, in a
difficult position to do the job. Generally, neighbor women no longer
help at birthing. Relatives no longer nurse their elders. It is not even
easy for some women to be available for their own children.
Frena Gray-Davidson is a bestselling health writer and educator.
